Paying close attention to another is one of the most profound skills available to us on a spiritual path. For example, in memorable teachings The Buddha proclaimed how few reliable sources of wisdom there are in this life: “There are two causes that allow right view to develop: the voice of the wise and the practice of appropriate attention. These are the two sources of wisdom.” (Mahavedalla Sutta) And yet paying close attention is a state that’s continually sabotaged by habitually ingrained conversational practices: while others speak we might find our minds occupied in planning our responses; we have tight busy schedules, and so we sit through dialogues with building impatience; we fixate on facts and details, overlooking an array of subtle information that’s being imparted to us; we may armor our empathetic faculties, guarding ourselves from connecting and opening to the feelings being articulated us via verbal and nonverbal communication (see exampl...
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